“Oh shit, I don’t want to start a blog” I laughed hysterically at that line in Life of the Party. It really hit home for someone who literally started a blog when she she went through her divorce. Yes that woman is me, but hear me out. It was never about the blog. It was the lifestyle, and the doors that would open for me because of the blog. You have to start somewhere, and after watering myself down for everyones comfort level for over a decade, I had plenty to say. Don’t you worry… I still do.
Here’s the thing about what I do: My story isn’t like a lot of others. When I got divorced I didn’t go out to get a job immediately, partially because I can be very strategic with the money I have and partially because of another thing that isn’t anyones fucking business. Anywhooo, I took a different route. I didn’t want to be stuck at a job that I hate because I’ve been sitting on my ass eating bon bons and watching tv for the last ten years. Ya know, stay at home mom shit.
I wanted to be home for my kids, I wanted to work for myself, I didn’t want there to be a ceiling to max out my potential or how much money I could make. So I started a blog. Not one that would be a hobby, and continue to bleed me dry just for shits and giggles. I created an opening, a real job that pays and pays big quick.
When you’re someone like me, who isn’t afraid to not fit into someones box, who likes to reach her potential sooner rather than later, and then keep reaching higher once that goal comes to fruition. It’s really hard to settle for something you know you’ll never want, just because it’s easier or it makes more sense. I don’t want to look back in 20 years and wonder what the hell I did with half my life (if I’m lucky).
This view on how I want to live my life has come with some skepticism from those around me. I generally think it translates into jealousy. “I can’t do what you’re doing because (insert excuse here)” and I agree, if you’re not willing to make some sacrifices then no sorry sweetie but you can’t or more likely you won’t. It takes a lot of balls to give your current life a proverbial middle finger and start over, especially in your 30s or later. But it’s never too late to start being a better version of yourself.
I know a lot of people think I’m just fucking off most days, saying I have a job just to say I do. They see me making time to do things that I want to do and assume that means I don’t have time to do adult shit. But guess what, I stay at home with my 3 kids, one week on one off. That off week leaves a lot of time for personal development, be it road trips, work, or day drinking and teaching my dog to retrieve missed beer pong balls. The weeks my kids are here, I’m still working. I keep some pretty weird hours. My phone is full of notes and a couple of lines for an idea I have for a blog post. I’m learning things I didn’t know how to do before, networking with people who are successful in the industries I want to work in. I don’t stop. Even the road trips and parts of my life that I’m loving are all a part of my job. It’s those stories that create the content people are loving.
I have more spinning plates than what seems humanly possible to keep up with, just like a lot of other people. Navigating life after divorce, raising kids, building a house, learning to co-parent, making new friends, dating, starting an empire from scratch, figuring out who I am and want to be, weeding out what’s not good for me, surviving a pandemic. It’s a lot, trust me, but I’ve got it. I’m getting better every day. I’m done making excuses for why I can’t do something. So don’t just assume I’m floating through life because it looks easy from the outside or because it makes you feel better about you. We all have this one life, and we all need to be accountable for how we spend it. So while you’re busy sitting back making excuses, I’m becoming Pirate Momma.